How To Attend Family Weddings Without Blowing Your Budget
Well, it’s June! I can’t believe we are pretty well halfway through the year. It’s usually wedding season, and I have two to attend this year. My youngest son has four to attend, and he is a groomsman in one of them. Costs can get high with weddings, and when they are family weddings, you really can’t say no. Like many families, we're excited to celebrate, but weddings can add up quickly. Between clothing, gifts, travel, and meals, the costs add up before you know it. Over the years, I've learned that it's possible to participate fully in family celebrations without straining the household budget.
Here are a few very simple and practical things you can do:
1. Set a Wedding Budget Before the Invitations Arrive
As soon as you know you'll be attending, decide what you're willing and able to spend. Think about things such as:
Gifts
Clothing
Travel
Accommodation
Meals
Write down what you think you can spend for each of these areas. This helps to prevent emotional spending later.
Before the invitation arrives
Make a plan and write down what items you will need to spend money on.
2. Shop Your Closet First
Before buying anything new, see what everyone already owns.
A different necklace can make an old dress feel new.
A new tie can refresh a suit.
Shoes from a previous special occasion may still work perfectly.
I’ll be honest: I did buy two new outfits for the weddings I will be attending, but I haven’t bought any new clothing for a few years, and the items I have bought can be used for other events. Also, I bought clothing that is comfortable but can be dressed up for any occasion. I’m using earrings I already have, a purse that belonged to my mom, and shoes that I already own.
If you are part of the family photos that will be taken, you can try to coordinate your color palette within your family - not always easy with six people, but possible, instead of everyone buying new outfits.
3. Borrow When It Makes Sense
Many people have:
Formal dresses
Suit jackets
Purses
Jewelry
Dress shoes
Ask if they don’t mind lending them to you for one weekend.
4. Watch for Sales Early
If you know about the wedding months in advance, start looking immediately for:
End-of-season sales
Clearance racks
Thrift stores
Consignment shops
The earlier you start, the less likely you'll pay full price.
Shop your closet first
Try to put an outfit together that you already own instead of buying new. If you buy new, make sure you can use that outfit again and again.
5. Share Accommodation
If appropriate, consider:
Booking a larger suite with relatives
Sharing a vacation rental
Splitting transportation
My family and I will be sharing a house I rented on Airbnb for one of the weddings, since it’s too far to drive home late at night. It’s a little cheaper than everyone getting a hotel room and allows us, as a family, to spend some time together, but always check with family members first to ensure everyone's comfortable.
6. Plan the Gift Thoughtfully
This is one of the trickier areas of attending a wedding, in my opinion. I always rack my brain as to a meaningful wedding gift, especially if the couple has been living together for some time. What do they need or want? But a meaningful gift doesn't have to be expensive.
Pool money with siblings or relatives.
Give a practical item from the registry.
Include a heartfelt note.
Cash is usually the most practical gift to give at a wedding, and most couples appreciate any dollar amount, especially if they are just starting to share a household together.
7. Pack Food Before You Travel
Road trips and wedding weekends can become expensive because of convenience food.
Pack:
Water bottles
Sandwiches
Snacks
Fruit
A few packed meals can save a surprising amount of money and time on the road.
8. Don't Let Social Media Set Your Budget
It's easy to feel pressure to have:
New outfits
Professional hair
Professional makeup
Expensive gifts
If you’re not part of the wedding party, most people are focused on the bride and groom, not what guests are wearing.
Weddings are a time to come together
But don’t feel pressured to spend extravagantly when buying a gift, renting accommodations, or buying an outfit.
9. Turn the Wedding Into a Mini Family Getaway
If you're already paying for gas, accommodation, and time off work, look for free or low-cost activities near the wedding location.
For example:
Visit a local park.
Explore a small-town main street.
Pack a picnic lunch.
Visit a farmers' market.
Take a scenic walk and snap family photos.
If you have to wait between the ceremony and the reception while the wedding party takes photographs, why not build a little extra fun into the trip? You're getting more value from the money you're already spending. Instead of thinking, "We spent $500 to $1,000 to attend a wedding," you can think, "We spent $500 to $1,000 on a wedding celebration and a memorable family weekend." Yes, it gets very expensive!
10. Remember Why You're There
The goal is to celebrate people you love, not to stage a perfect Instagram moment. Some of the best wedding memories come from laughing with family, not from spending money.
Remember who you are there for
A wedding is a chance to see a close family member start out on a new path in their life.
For me, it’s the memories to be made. Both weddings I’m attending this year are my nephews’. I’ve seen them grow up from tiny babies to grown men. Now, they are taking a new path in their life, and the fact that they want my family and me there means the world to me. It may get expensive, but it’s one day in their life that I get to share with them.